First things first though, my art project for the week:

Lookie what I drew! *bricked*

So I can’t use colored pencil well.  Oh well, I tried.  That and a chibi style, which didn’t go as bad as I thought.  Moving on…

Yesterday~  I finaly RNGed a shiny on HeartGold!  <3  It was a vulpix that I need to train and evolve before sending it over to Black due to a lack of Fire Stones.  I feel proud of myself! *bricked again*  Gonna try for… not sure, maybe sandshrew next?

Well this is probably the shortest entry (word wise) I’ve ever done.  Oh, but I got my glasses back~  Ok, now I’m done.

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I’m realizing how to be more responsible.  I know it’s rather late to realize it, but I guess I feel like acctually doing something productive.  Like dishes, cleaning up, learning a new language.  Ok, the last one’s not a responsibility, but I’m gaining some momentum.  So, to get feelers out to see how much of what I’m feeing is long term, I’m going to set a goal. *gasp!*  Something I haven’t done in years.  I’m going to start small and fairly short-term in the grand scheme of things, not only because my moods fluctuate so quickly but also due to my fear of failure.  My first goal (in forever) will be an artistic one (because it sounds attainable), I must create something artistic once a week for a month.  Sounds pretty easy for art majors, but I lack thier drive and talent.  So on Saturdays, I will post a picture of what I made be it clay, drawing, or something else I feel like making/doing.  I’ll try and challenge myself a bit but I dubt anything will come out well.  But it’s ok, it’s just a test.

I’m also planning to open up free hosting for those who are interested.  And meet requirements.  But I guess my fear of failure is hoding that back a bit, I’ve never done it before and I’d hate to let people down.  So, meh, not sure when it’ll happen.  If you happen to be interested and want more information, leave a comment or e-mail me (admin@melancholy-dream.net).  /shamelessplug

One final note on contacts, maybe due to the fact they’re a higher perscription I get kinda drowzy when doing close work with them.  Driving and such is great because I’ve got about 20/12 but everything else is “oh, this was interesting/fun about 10 minutes ago, can I sleep yet?”  They’re still a pain to take out and put in >.<  *sigh*  Hopefully my glasses will be in by the end of this week.

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Really, I think I am.  Most people I know of are stress bakers, but I can’t seem to bake very well so I cook other things.  It’s really strange for me, always hearing people complain about making dinner and realizing that I would rather make it than order a pizza.  So right now I’m waiting for creme brulee to get out of the oven.  I’m really unorthodox when it comes to custards.  Whenever I add hot milk to eggs, the eggs cook on contact.  Maybe the milk is too hot, but I use a work around.  Pretty much (for this recipe) I add the yolk mixture to the heavy cream and let it cook on the stove, stirring it constantly.  When the ripples start to get larger (thicker, fewer, whatever you’d like to call it)  and it feels thicker, I remove it from the heat and call it good.  Not sure how bad this is or how it changes the flavor/consistency, but it works a lot better for me.

Anyway, on Mother’s Day I attempted macarons.  They failed epically.  They were the wrong shape and over cooked to burnt.  Come to find out, I didn’t mix the meringue enough and the temp was too high.  And they were in there longer than they should have been.  So I picked up a book in the bargain section at B&N that I hope to try out later this week.  But I found out just how expensive almond meal/flour is…  $12 for 1 pound.  Guess who’s not getting anything else till she gets paid.  But I think they’ll turn out better this time, I know what I did wrong and have a very good idea as to how to fix it.

In other, non-cooking news, I’m trying out contacts.  I still have issues getting them in, but I don’t think I’ll have a choice come tomorrow.  I need new lenses and really love my frames so I’ll need to send in the frames for the lenses to be made.  I wonder how I’ll feel about contacts after wearing them exclusivly for a couple weeks!

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I think so!  Well, more like mood deterioration.  I wake up, ready to cope and by the end of the day I want to yell till I’m blue in the face.  So I end up stewing in my room at night.  Thankfuly, my dad took grandma and cousin up to visit people in Michigan today through part of tomorrow.  And they leave Friday morning so less than a day left to deal with them.  *sigh*  Hopefully I won’t do something stupid or rash tomorrow.  Just a little longer…

I finally beat Black!  It was soooo goooood~  Makes me wanna hug N.  But I totally didn’t expect to fight Ghetsis after N!  And for their pokemon to be at such high levels!  A walkthrough said lvl 45 minimum, for the elite four and mine were 46-48.  Used almost all my max revives, too bad you can’t buy them.  But I really am surprised that I didn’t lose.  Oh, another thing that surprised me (more like downright shocked), that Rashiram/Zerkrom and Victini aren’t “auto-catches” if you will.  One being an intrical part of the story and the other being an event.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining.  It’s just that for both Rashiram and Victini I threw 1 ultra ball and it caught.  I figured it was part of the story/event but I’m reading that you should load up on ultra and dusk balls before the elite four.  For Cobalion and the grass one (forgot its name…) I had to keep chucking ultra balls.  Weird.  Maybe fire types like me…?

In the same vein, transferred a couple dittos over and got my Rotom (Eeks?  What kind of nickname is that?) and bred a female dratini with extreme speed.  Yay?  Got a lot of breeding to do.  And transferring so I can breed.

And I’m realizing just how bad I am at graphic design.  I knew I wasn’t good, but now I know I need to read some books or something.  In addition to tutorials, but knowledge before application.  It depresses me, but at least I have a better idea of how far I need to go.

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A people sort of storm, not the natural disaster sort.  Well for my emotions it may as well be a natural disaster.  Yes, I’m talking about my cousin and grandma.  They’re due to arrive in less than a week now.  I have a horrible feeling that things won’t go well.  I’ll do or say something rash, I won’t call it stupid yet, and there’ll be another fiasco like last time.  If that does happen, I hope my dad will actually stand by me instead of cater to my bratty cousin.  Time will tell.  In a more practical sense, I’m cleaning the bathroom.

May as well get the negative stuff out of the way now.  Some jack ass on VDex is trying to, in essence, steal from Shiro.  I won’t quote the article or go into detail, but that’s unjustifiable and inexcusable regardless of their economic standing.  It really pisses me off how low some people are.  I feel horrible for Shiro that she has to deal with all this crap on top of her own life.

Back to more mundane topics.  Started playing Aika with a few people from Gaia.  I’m only lvl 10 but I can’t tell what the fuss is about.  So far, it’s just grind, complete quests, and purchase skills.  Not much in the way of character building or community so far.  I really want to play Rift though!  Unfortunately, it’s $50 and I’m broke T_T  Oh well, it’ll have to wait.

Completed my first trade in Pokemon Black!  Got a couple White exclusives (Solosis and Petilil).  Right now I’m grinding to make sure I can beat the last gym and am planning to get a legendary or 2 before that.

Oh!  That reminds me, I’m switching over the fanlistings to a collective site.  Link is on the right.  And along with that, I kinda started archiving my games and pokemon…  Yes, I have no life.  I’ll put up FCs sooner or later for trading purposes.  I think that’s all the site news.  Probably, I don’t do much with my hosting x.x

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About trying to get back into polymer clay, not sure if that’s gonna happen anymore.  I’m finding that it’s more difficult and frustrating than I remember.  I may give something easy a go before quitting, but I’m doubting that right now.  Made a better Bulbasaur, first one wasn’t that easy on the eyes.

The better Bulbasaur with 2 Pokeballs

I really want to make a Charmander, but I don’t want to get really frustrated.  *sigh*  I’ll figure it out.

Trying to teach my mom how to crochet did not work out.  She got frustrated, I got frustrated so we called it quits.She can chain just fine but for whatever reason her stitches get messed up.

On the topic of making things, I attempted a fruit tart last week.  I was pleasantly surprised with how it turned out and how easy it was.  The only thing I’d change is how the custard is made.  I’d combine the yolk mixture and milk earlier because I found that the yolk cooks too quickly with simmering milk.  Kinda how creme brulee is made.

It was yummy!

Worked a fair amount last week, 3 hours Thursday and 7 on Saturday.  I know, I need another job.  Usually I’ll get 4 hours a week.

Ok, I just need to mention this: I swear there’s a ghost in the house today.  Been hearing noises at the back door, metal clanging in the kitchen (and nothing moved), and various small noises everywhere else.  No, it’s not the cat.  It’s been freaking me out and the fact that I’m by myself doesn’t help.

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I just noticed that 1/3 of all my cookbooks are devoted to sweets and another 1/3 are devoted to beverages.  Not that I have a ton of cookbooks to begin with, but I just bought another one and had to make room for it.  Maybe I should start a cafe or pastry shop xD

But anyway, my parents and I went to the Blue Chip casino today, well yesterday now.  My dad wanted to try his hand at cash game poker and my mom and I just wanted to check it out, I had never been to casino before.  First, because I guess I look young enough to still be in high school, my license was swiped/scanned/something and when the guy asked me my age, I almost blanked.  Pretty bad for a 22 year old.  Anywho once “inside” there was much awkward standing around.  None of us knew what to do so I proceeded to lose 60 cents on a slot machine.  Which my mom promptly won back plus some.  I really didn’t think the smoke would bother me because my grandma used to smoke, but my mom and I decided to leave my dad to go shopping because I felt sick…

Usually, when I go to the Outlet Mall, I find it boring and get really cranky waiting for people to finish looking at and trying on clothes.  Maybe because I knew what the alternative was (sitting in a smoky casino losing money) I was much more patient.  Or maybe I was in a better mood?  Who knows.  But I found a butane torch (for creme brule) and a cookbook for desserts to go with coffee!  Can’t wait to try some of those recipies!  Oh, and a pair of sandals from Sketchers, it was BOGO 50% off so my mom told me to find something.  I like them, I just hope I’ll use them!

And the icing of the cake was the fact that UCONN won!  <3  Yay huskies!  ^_^

On another note entirely, I’m trying to get back into polymer clay again.  looking up different techniques and making different things.  Currently trying to make pokemon…  And failing.  But practice makes perfect right?  Also I’m planning to try to teach my mom the basics of crocheting.  Key word: try.

Sorry about the misspellings and the jumping around, as I’m rather tired.

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More like a random series of thoughts that may or may not have anything to do with each other.   I.e. rambling.

Speaking of ie, some add on was causing it to crash every time I tried to open any site.  Still not sure exactly which add on it was, probably a Norton one, but it’s working again.  Yes, ie isn’t the best of browsers, but I’m used to it and am not a fan of how Chrome displays favorites, because I bookmark everything, and Firefox is a bit “heavy” if you know what I mean.

I just pre-ordered Pokemon Black.  Honestly I was waiting for the price to drop after it’s release, but Amazon has an offer I couldn’t pass up.  A $10 Amazon credit, so, in a way, the game’s $25.  There’s always something I could put a $10 credit towards, plus free shipping.

It’s so depressing that Borders is closing!  I’m not sure why, but I’ve always preferred Borders to Barnes & Noble.  A small part is that for B&N you have to pay to be a part of their rewards program, but even before that I remember liking Borders more.  *sigh*  I did take advantage of their store closing sale though.  Bought 3 more manga (which brings the total of unread volumes to 10), a “teach yourself French” book, and 2 cook books.  Oh, and a bar of Lindt chocolate :3  I know it’s stupid and irrational, but I feel bad taking advantage of the sale.  I’m profiting from someone’s misfortune.  They’re trying to save money by having this sale, I know, but I can’t shake the feeling.

Been playing Dragon Age Origins practically non-stop these past 3 weeks, I think I built my character wrong and/or have horrible tactics settings because I find that I have to load a lot due to dying.  Currently around Landsmeet and romancing Alistair, not really sure how that’s gonna go…  Horribly enough, I don’t want to put him on the throne.  Maybe I won’t, seeing that I’m having a difficult time with my character anyway.  Hopefully my next play through will be better.

Just noticed that I need to adjust the time zone…  Anyway, Happy Early Girl’s Day!

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Ok, so things may or may not still work (i.e. links) but I thinkI covered everything.  In a nutshell, my host was attacked and around 19 nodes were brought down.  Of course everything was erased, so this is the first post since June!  Wow!  I’ve been gone forever! /sarcasim  I actually am surprised that I kept the backup from then.  This definitely teaches me to backup more often.  Back on subject, I’m staying with my host seeing that they were up front about the attack.  Honesty is something I really respect, especially if telling the truth could be harmful to you.  This wasn’t their fault and while I’m peeved that it happened, what can you do other than be proactive?  And learn from your mistakes of course ^_^

Obviously this is a new layout.  Started work on it before all the downtime but kinda threw it together trying to get everything back up ASAP.  I’m satisfied with it, meaning while it doesn’t look the best it won’t be tweaked, it’s simple and in my opinion, can represent both winter and spring well.  Yes, I drew the sakura…  Don’t laugh at me!  *runs away*

Hopefully catch-up will occur in the next entry.  Right now I need food and a pain killer.

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Ok!  Everything except for toiletries, my laptop and a couple chargers are packed.  I’m all set for tomorrow.  But I’m coming close to hyper-ventalating.  No good reason why, just really anxious.  I don’t want to go because of my parents and family obligations.  It just feels like I’m shutting down, both physically and emotionally.  I feel sick to my stomach, if I could vomit, I would.  And emotionally I’m irritable, lethargic, and depressed.  I just want to get on the plane and be done with it.

But it has been an interesting couple days.  Thursday I went shopping for a swimsuit and all they had was tankinis…  I put on a lot of weight over the past 5 years or so and trying them on was a painful experience.  I got 2 sets.  When we get back I’ll have to start excersizing.

And on Friday, my sister and I were going to drop off library books and see The A-Team but her car broke down.  Thankfuly, we had already dropped off the library books.  First the brakes started to go, but we thought we would make it there and back no problem.  Then at a light the car stalled, neither of us heard it but whatever, we kept going.  Before we got to the next light it had stalled.  Don’t get me wrong, it was still going, but she couldn’t accelerate.  Pulled into a random driveway, power steering and brakes failed but we stopped without hitting anything.  The next hour and a half was spent calling people, she was calling friends to see if someone could rescue us and I was calling my dad, a repair shop, and a towing company.  We both called home in the hopes that my mom would answer the phone but she was mowing and didn’t check the messages when she got in.  Thankfully, Amanda found someone to take us home and the car was towed.  Even better, my dad oked it to be fixed and we picked it up that night.  Oh, and there wasn’t anything wrong with my car so it’s good to go.

I found a wi-fi hot spot walking distance from my grandparent’s house so if it is really there, I may post once or twice durring the next 2 weeks.  If not, you’ll know why.  See you in July!

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